I already have a "dog tag" with his name and home phone number which is meant to be glued to his back chute. It has his name on phone number. I am not so sure it has enough information. I worked up new information to put on a tag.
See what you think:
Hi, my name is Frankie. I live at ## N #th St, Dixie, AL, 555-4696. Despite causing my keeper, Leann, very serious finger, foot and back injuries, she really wants me back.
A few more things: What ever you do, DON'T EAT ME! My last meal was probably cat poop or poisonous mushrooms: Frankie soup could be your last meal, EVER.
Maybe you are thinking I'm worth some money. If you put me in your car within 10 minutes I will churn out an unbelievable amount of poop and pee. The necessary professional car detailing and carpet cleaning will cost more than I am worth. I will certainly bring CATASTROPHIC damage to your house while you look for a buyer on Craig's List.
If you want some money, call or take me back to Leann and she will give you a nice reward, a batch of homemade brownies or dark chocolate biscotti (your choice) and a hero's mention in my blog.
One more thing, if you're reading this tag while it's attached to my butt, you may want to back off NOW. No telling what's coming out of there next.
Quit while you are ahead and just call Leann. Her number is 555-4696.
Think that will fit on a tag?