Guess what! This is starting out to be the BEST SUMMER EVER! I am not kidding. I just got the best news. Mom came out a little while ago and told me Tigger (you remember that dumb dog that lives down the street) is coming to stay the week with us! Is this incredible or what? I am gonna kick that dog's butt! He will not know what hits him.
Actually, um, Mom says Tigger is a girl. Well that still doesn't matter, I am gonna kick Tigger's butt. After I kick HER butt, I am going to lay down some Frankie Laws since she doesn't rule this roost!
Most important, the backyard is Frankie's Yard. It's not Tigger's temporary digs. If she wants some space she can just get my Mom to walk her home to her own backyard. But if Tigger wants to use my backyard, she has to mind Frankie's Laws.
The Dogloo and the Rubbermaid backyard storage shelter in the backyard are mine! Prepare to meet your doom should you decide to take a snooze in either of these two places filled with nice clean hay.
All cat poo in Frankie's Yard is for Frankie. I don't share any cat poo with dumb dogs. Go to your own yard and find your own cat poo. Mouth and paws off my cat poo.
The Kiddy pool in the yard is for ME. It's not for dirty dog feet and the water is not doggy drinking water. If necessary, I will keep it filled with sulcata poop to make that perfectly clear.
Apparently mom has a No Dog Poo Rule in the back yard so I don't have much to say about that except "drat."
Don't go running after or barking at the birds and the chipmunks. Since dogs are too dumb to tell the difference between a chipmunk and a squirrel then you will just have to leave the squirrels alone too. Go ahead and chase any cat that dare enter my domain during the day. Cats are only allowed after dark.
Now on to my plans for a Tigger fun week. I am gonna need some time to put together some really devious plans. I already know that some will involve ambushes and charges. Thank goodness I got the evening to think about all this. I may not be able to sleep tonight, I am SO excited!